August 6, 2009

Strong, passionate, and dangerous?

One of my daughters has been reading excerpts from Eldredge’s Wild at Heart. She is preparing for marriage one day and I want her to think seriously about what she should expect in a man. She came across the description of “strong, passionate, and dangerous” (p.46) and asked, “Should I actually have a man who is dangerous?”

A good question for us to consider. Should we be dangerous? How is that consistent with the patriarchal role?

Webster defined dangerous as “perilous; hazardous; exposing to loss; unsafe; full of risk.” That seems to be the opposite of what most women want. They want security and warmth. They want to feel loved and cherished. They want to know their man will be around to provide and protect. But they also need to be able to respect their man.

The need for provision and protection requires risk-taking. By our very nature, before we are tamed or emasculated by the feminine world, men are born risk-takers. Our nature draws us to lay our life on the line, to be willing to die for God and family in the pursuit of providing needs and protecting from harm. That is what makes men respectworthy.

If we can step out of our religious box we will have to admit that Jesus, the model of ultimate masculinity, was a risk-taker and constantly exposed his disciples to danger. Jesus is not by any stretch of the imagination the limp-wristed effeminate wimp, lamb draped over his shoulder, and playing with lots of little children, that Aunt Ethel’s Sunday school class has made him out to be! We need to rip that silly picture out of our Bible, and that false image out of our minds.

Jesus lived a life of constant danger, and continually exposed his disciples to life-threatening experiences. Granted the disciples were all male, about 19 or 20, and full of testosterone. They were ready to take on the world. But Jesus pushed them beyond their limits, and commanded their respect in the process.

Twice he deliberately sent them on a sailing voyage knowing they would face the storm of their lives. Once he went to sleep in the back of the boat. The next time he sent them on ahead, and caught up with them by walking on the water. Both times the maritime experience of these fishermen was no match for the elements. The boats were breaking apart and the young fearless men were scared to death. What did Jesus do? He slapped them around a little. “Why are you so afraid?”

Another time Jesus had an all-points-bulletin out for his arrest in Judea. He was waiting in the wilderness for the most opportune time to go there, where the danger of arrest and death would be greatest, when he got word that friend Lazarus was sick. He waited more, until he was sure Lazarus was dead. I guess he wanted to attract a lot of attention when he put his life on the line. By now at least Thomas was catching on. He said to the others, “Let us also go, that we may die with Him.”

The most dangerous thing Jesus did -- and the thing that cost him his life -- was that he waltzed into Jerusalem like a king who had already conquered. On the busiest day of the year. While folks were shouting praises! Talk about drawing attention. Jesus went straight into the temple and shut down the profit center. He then sat down to teach in seats reserved for the priests, and began to criticize them! Wouldn’t you say that was dangerous? Needless to say the religious folks were furious, and they manipulated the Romans into putting him to death on the most hideous form of torture and execution ever devised.

Yet Jesus knowingly and willingly did all that to restore us to what we were before Adam gave it all away in a disgusting display of passive laziness. Accessing his grace and following his example helps us to be the men we were intended to be. We cannot fulfil our patriarchal calling unless we are risk-takers.

So to my daughter I would ask, which do you respect more? The noble warrior who gave it all so that others might live? Or the disgusting wimp who backed away from defending his wife because she liked the looks of the fruit and he wanted to be a nice guy?

To men I ask, which man do you want to be? As for me, no more Mr. Nice Guy! I’d rather be strong, passionate, and dangerous.

2 comments:

  1. Patriarch's DaughterAugust 6, 2009 at 8:15 AM

    Daddy, I think I'll go with the Man. The Dangerous one.

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  2. Fantastic job describing Christ! Most of us have bought into the idea of the "meek and mild Christ." I wonder how comfortable we would be if the real Christ dropped in on Sunday morning?

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